By Crystal, Gilda’s Club Member
I was eight years old when cancer first entered my life. On March 24, 1992, my dad told us he had cancer, and even though I didn’t understand it then, that moment would go on to shape so much of who I am today.
My dad went on to battle multiple cancers, and unfortunately, so did my mom. I lost my dad to cancer in December 2020 and my mom in December 2023.
But a little about my parents. They were funny, joyful, and made life feel full even in the hardest moments. Before family pictures, my dad would yell, “JC Penny catalog pose!” and suddenly we’d all break into cheesy smiles, pretend waves, or dramatic stares into the distance. We knew exactly what to do, and we laughed every time.
They taught me that strength isn’t about pretending things are easy. It’s about choosing to keep going and making the best of each moment.
Caring for them through their battles was incredibly difficult. After my dad passed away and while I was still caring for my mom, I completely wore myself down. That’s when I realized I couldn’t do it all alone, so I joined a support group for caregivers at Gilda’s Club.
At first, I hesitated. I told myself I was strong enough to handle it and that maybe someone else needed support more than I did. But after some encouragement, I promised myself I’d try just one meeting. If it didn’t feel right, I didn’t have to go back.
When I got there, everything changed. As people started sharing, I kept thinking, yes, that’s exactly how I feel. I immediately felt seen, surrounded by people who understood in ways others couldn’t. Even when our situations were different, the feelings were the same. For the first time, I had a safe space to put down what I’d been carrying, a place where I didn’t have to be strong all the time. Over time, I realized it wasn’t just about being supported. It was about being there for others too.
If you’ve ever felt hesitant about seeking support, I encourage you to give it a try. You don’t have to speak. You can just listen and see how it feels. For me, that one meeting opened the door to a group of people who have become my chosen family, the ones I can celebrate with, laugh with, and lean on when life gets heavy. They’ve made my life so much better, and I’m incredibly grateful that Gilda’s brought them to me.
That circle of support at Gilda’s, along with my friends, family, amazing husband, and beautiful children, are the reason I’m standing strong today.
I often think back to that little girl hearing the word cancer for the first time. She didn’t have a place like Gilda’s back then, but I’m so grateful I found it as an adult. Support is available at any age and at every stage of the journey. That’s what makes Gilda’s so special. It’s here for all of us, no matter when or how cancer touches our lives.
And as for that “JC Penny catalog pose”? It still makes me smile. My dad’s sense of humor taught me the importance of finding moments of joy, even in the middle of something hard. It’s something I carry with me and something I see reflected every time I walk through the doors of Gilda’s Club, surrounded by people who find ways to laugh, love, and live fully, no matter what life brings.
To everyone at Gilda’s, and to those who support this incredible community, thank you. Your compassion helps create a place where healing happens through connection, laughter, and understanding. I’m forever grateful to be part of it.
